


I'm Going to Marry Her Anyway

by Vic_writes01



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Alternate Universe - No Pennywise (IT), Alternate Universe - Royalty, Forbidden Love, Marriage, Marriage Proposal, Multi, Romantic Fluff, Stanley Uris Loves Patricia Blum Uris
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-04-28
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:02:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23535730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vic_writes01/pseuds/Vic_writes01
Summary: As the kingdoms of Maine and Florida feud, their given heirs, Princess Patricia of Florida and Prince Stanley of Maine sneak behind their backs to court each other. Both of them had never wanted to be a royal, and both were forced into the limelight quite late in their lives. Stan was just finishing high school when he was ordered to give up his college plans.8 years later, after all his royal inductions and training, he is ready to marry and with traditionalists, as grandparents, he is forced to marry a princess. The only problem is, it won't be Patty, will it?
Relationships: Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Bill Denbrough/Mike Hanlon, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Patricia Blum Uris/Stanley Uris
Kudos: 4





	I'm Going to Marry Her Anyway

**Author's Note:**

> This is a gift for the lovely @Pattyblumuris on Tumblr.

“Stan? Are you even listening?” Richie asks his Prince best friend, but he didn’t give an answer, too caught up thinking about how messed his life is. 

Stan used to be a normal guy, he went to school and had friends. He lived a normal life, in Derry, but as it turns out his life was far from normal. His best friend, Richie Tozier often describes it as the “Princess Diaries” as Princess Mia had, too, lived a normal life until she found out that she was, in fact, a princess. 

Ever since Stan tried his best to keep in contact with his best friends, it didn’t always go to plan but they managed. Sometimes, the Losers would have to send letters to him if he was away on a business trip as the Prince of Maine. Stan hates it, he wants a normal life, going out clubbing with his friends and studying something of interest, at college. The Prince always loved the idea of becoming an accountant or maybe a finance officer of some sort; he loves money. 

If he’s seen drinking or doing anything that is not Prince-like it shows up in the media as a scandal! Usually worse than that of the youtube and A-List celebrity bullshit. All he could ever think of is what his life would’ve been like if it weren’t for the fact that he was Prince. 

Even his girlfriend, Patricia Blum, Princess of Florida, hates it. You see, Maine and Florida are supposed to be enemies, and so, whilst Stan visits Eddie & Richie in New York, he tries to time it with Patricia. It’s a tough gig but the two manage, having a hidden phone just so they can talk to each other and their friends without the paranoia of somebody finding out that they’ve been mingling with outsiders. 

  
  


“Huh? Sorry,” Stan replies.

“I said that I’m thinking of asking Eddie to marry me.”

“Richard! That’s amazing!” Stan practically jumps from couch to hug the comedian, almost knocking their beers over in the process. “Do you have the ring?”

“Y-yeah, give me a sec.” Richie leaves his living room and walks down the hall. 

Not even a moment later, the tall comedian walks back in with a velvet box. He opens the small box, inside is a silver ring with ‘ _R + E_ ’ etched on the inside and a small diamond in the front. 

“It’s stunning, he’ll love it.”

“You think?” Stan nods. “Well, enough about me, what about you and Patty?”

“You know full well that we can’t, it’s like a Romeo and Juliette situation.”

“WIthout death?”

“Obviously!”

His whole situation is messed up, even though he’s currently in New York, Patty couldn’t make it this time. Her parents had caught her mysteriously leaving the grounds and so they grounded her flight. So that left him alone. He often refers to her as his Juliet and she calls him Romeo. That’s just because their situation is far too similar to the mythical story told by the famous Shakespeare. The media represents Tybalt; while Richie and Eddie are his Mercutio and Benvolio. 

“Why can’t you just propose and elope somewhere?” Richie asks.

“That would be cool if we weren’t recognised around the world!” Stan states.

“What if Bev conducts the wedding? She’s legalised, she’d be more than willing.”

Stan thinks for a moment.

If Bev conducted the wedding, then that would be pretty awesome. Stan and Patty both had last names before becoming a prince and princess, so maybe it isn’t such a bad idea. Bev has always been there for him, much like Richie, and she absolutely adores Patty. Maybe this can work, but then there’s the arranged marriage that his parents want him to have.

That is a huge issue, Stan longs to be with Patty but when he became crown prince, under the ruling of the King and Queen, Stan must have an arranged marriage with any princess of their choosing. And because Maine and Florida have a long-standing feud, Stan knows that his chances of being married to the beautiful Florida princess are slim to none.

“Babe! I’m home,” Eddie calls out, “oh sorry, I thought you’d be in the office.” The hypochondriac walks into the apartment and sits right beside Stan. “How are you, Stan?”

“Could be better,” the prince replies. 

“Patty couldn’t make it,” Richie fills in.

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” Eddie says, hugging his best friend.

“It’s okay, one of us was bound to get caught,” Stan says and finishes off the rest of his beer. 

Neither of the other two can comprehend what Stan must be going through, never having to hide a relationship from anyone, but Sonia Kaspbrak. They had met Patty on several occasions and they all loved her; normally they wouldn’t let an insider in, but she just clicked. She is like another Stan but combined with a hint of Beverly and Ben due to her quick wit, intelligence, badass and sweet side. 

If they have to let some strange woman, who Stan doesn’t like, into their tight-knit group, the boys and Bev will explode with anger. Patty is an honorary member of their club and for the first time in forever, they all see how much Patty means to Stan, and to each other. 

“You could always run away, you know?” Eddie says.

“I know, but with the media being the way it is, in this modern age, we’ll be traced and separated,” Stan explains. “If I say anything to my grandparents, I’m dead, metaphorically speaking.”

“Why?” Richie asks.

“We’ve been over this!” Stan sighs. “Florida and Maine have been in a feud for centuries. My grandparents would have my head if I am courting let alone married to the Florida Princess!”

Stan makes his way into Richie and Eddie’s kitchen and pulls out a scotch glass, pouring in one of Richie’s many bottles of Bourbon. He takes one sip before making his way back to the boys. 

“I don’t know what to do. I want to propose but at the same time - ”

“She was caught,” Richie says sadly, filling in the blank for his best friend.

Stan lets out a strangled sob which causes both Eddie and Richie to perk up and hug their friend. The Prince of Maine has never been one for hugs but tonight he needed alcohol and the sweet, sweet comfort of Richie and Eddie. They are the only two that Stan feels comfortable talking to about his problems with Maine and Florida. The ache in his chest continues to burn as he cries, he grabs hold of both of the other men’s forearms for comfort. 

Suddenly the door swings open, revealing one of Stan’s guards.

“You have been requested back at the palace at once, your highness,” The guard says, suddenly the realisation that Stan is crying causes him to rush forward. “What have you two done!?”

“They - they haven’t done anything, they were comforting me on a personal matter,” Stan replies. “Why am I requested at home? I have been allowed this time off to spend with my friends.”

“Unfortunately, I don’t have that answer. All I know is that it is urgent and that all your friends are requested to go as well.”

Stan quickly wipes his eyes and goes to grab his belongings and as does the couple, who were requested to do so, upon Stan’s guard. 

**** **** **** ****

The flight back to Maine felt like a day had gone by. Richie and Eddie were quite understandably nervous, on the flight, as they have never been asked to attend the palace before. Sure they were allowed on the grounds if it was to visit Mike and Bill who work on the farm but were always requested to never go into the palace. 

Upon entry, Stan and his companions are greeted with workers cleaning the floor and the dining room they use if they have important guests coming. Fear strikes Stan, hoping that this doesn’t mean what he thinks it means. 

“Ah, Stanley, how nice of you to grace us with your presence,” Stan’s grandmother exclaims. “I see that you brought your,” she pauses to take a look at the two boys behind Stan, “friends.”

She had never approved of Stan’s friends, claiming them all to be a bit too lower class for them. Both she and her husband wanted nothing but the best for Stan, so keeping him away from the commoners seemed most appropriate. They knew that he would go to hang out with them though, whenever Bev, Ben, Richie and Eddie visited Mike and Bill. Mike works on the grounds, running the show for the maintenance and his boyfriend, Bill used to come often in between semesters at college. But since finishing, Bill has become a permanent resident, writing novels in the garden and helping whenever he can.

The couple gives Stan a reason to, somewhat, enjoy his time in the palace. He has people he can talk to and keep him company on a daily basis whenever he isn’t needed elsewhere.

“What’s wrong with them gran?” Stan asks. “You’re fine with Mike, Bev and Bill, why not the rest?”

“They’re commoners, Stanley.”

Richie and Eddie tense up a little. 

“Gran, Richie is just as famous as Bill and Bev, and Eddie is becoming a surgeon. Ben’s an architect that you have used on several occasions,” Stan huffs, “compared to them, I’m the commoner.”

The prince grabs his two best friends and runs up the stairs to his bedroom. 

*

The prince’s quarters is something that the outsiders know, that doesn’t match Stan’s personality. It’s bland and beige, something that Stan isn’t. Sure he may seem like that to some people, but to the Losers, Stan is anything but bland. Only Richie knows, but Stan’s quite the artist when it comes to birds, he used to take Richie bird watching once a month and then would sit back and paint. 

“Are you okay Stan?” Eddie asks.

“No, she called you commoners and I’m meeting my potential wife tonight. I am everything but okay!” Stan exclaims and falls back onto his bed in perturbation. 

“If you don’t like her, we can all step in. Mike and Bill will be coming right?” Richie asks.

“Maybe, look, I don’t want any of you to step in. My grandmother can have you all banished, from the palace, in the blink of an eye,” Stan explains. “If one steps in, all of you are gone.”

The distress in Stan’s voice hangs in the air and the two men have no idea how to comfort him. They don’t know the rules or the customs of being part of a royal family, and each one has different rules and customs of which they follow. Knowing that Stan is in a state of panic takes them back to their childhood when Stan hated life and lived in fear. Even then, they had no idea what to do to comfort their friend.

Suddenly a loud bang causes the three men to jump, all of them turning their heads towards the door where Stan’s grandma stands, her face red with anger. 

“I want them out of here! You know they aren’t allowed in the palace!” Stan’s gran exclaims.

“No! I am almost 26, you need to stop treating me like a child!” Stan yells causing Eddie and Richie to look at their friend in shock. Stan has never raised his voice, not once, he’s always been quiet and shy, has never said anything bad about anyone. Well, maybe Richie is the exception, he can be quite annoying and Stan would be the first to announce it.

“How dare you talk to me like that. I want them out until the guests arrive for dinner at 6 o’clock sharp!” She stands as she waits for the two men to run out of Stan’s bedroom. “You may go with them but I want you dressed appropriately at 4.”

Stan leaps from his bed and races down the stairs to catch up to his friends.

*

The 3 of them head down a small little path to the little cottage that houses Bill and Mike. It’s a quaint little place, very stereotypical, with rose bushes and vines decorating the exterior walls. But the styling inside is all modern with renovations done by Mike and with some help from Ben. Stan loves visiting whenever he’s free and will have the occasional glass of red with the groundskeeper. 

“Ah, what brings you three to my lovely abode?” Mike exclaims hugging each of them.

“We were kicked out,” Richie says.

“I took them up to my room and gran kicked them out,” Stan explains. “Anyway, what are you and Bill doing tonight?”

“We were going to have a romantic dinner, why?”

“Romantic dinner as in ‘lovemaking’?” Richie asks.

“Beep, beep Richie,” Eddie says.

“It’s just, we’re having dinner with some guests from another kingdom. I guess for me to meet my future wife. These two are already coming,” Stan says gesturing to Richie and Eddie, “I want you and Bill there too. I would get Bev and Ben but as you know, it’s late notice.” 

Mike agrees and races to Bill’s office to tell him about the change of plans. 

With Bill focusing on his novel that needs to be sent away for publishing in 2 days, it’s just Mike and the 3 other men. Richie starts to speculate on the 5 princesses that Stan could be getting married to. 

But what concerns both Eddie and Mike is how they didn’t do a party of sorts where each princess meets the prince and he chooses or whatever. Stan explains that because he came into this whole royalty thing so late he missed that opportunity. The only princess he knows that isn’t married and is his age is of course Patty. But because of the feud between the kingdoms, his chances are slim.

“How long has it been since you spoke to Patty?” Mike asks.

“2 days, she said that she wouldn’t be able to talk because they found her spare phone,” Stan says. “She was caught trying to sneak out.”

Before they stopped talking, Patty had said that she had an arranged marriage lined up, neither was thrilled but they knew that that was their fate. They were never supposed to be together.

*

Time quickly passes and Stan races up to the palace with Eddie in tow, so that he could borrow some clothes. Richie was borrowing from Bill since they are of similar height and build. 

“Eddie, I can give you anything from in here, then you have to leave, got it?” Stan says.

“Yes, sir,” Eddie replies and starts to look through Stan’s wardrobe, grabbing a shirt, jacket and pants, all of which Stan hadn’t worn in 4 years.

The hypochondriac runs out of the room, and hopefully, to the safety of Mike’s house. Thus, leaving Stan by himself.

“Master Stanley, we are ready for you,” someone says from outside Stan’s door, probably one of the many servants. 

Stan opens the door and smiles politely at the worker. “Please Dylan, it’s Stan. No need for the formalities with me.”

“Sorry, Stan,” Dylan says and leads the prince down to the main foyer. 

The prince slots himself between the Queen and the banister of the stairs waiting for the all-clear to head out to greet their guests. Stan longs for his friends to be there with him, he can’t bear to go through this alone; 2 hours is a long time to wait for his support crew to arrive.

The main doors open and the 3 royals walk out to the front just as the limousine rolls up.

“I present to you the king, queen and princess of Florida.”

Stan couldn’t believe it, it takes everything in him to not run up and kiss the princess as she gets out of the vehicle. Just like always, Princess Patty Blum looks stunning, her crisp golden hair glistening in the setting sun. The baby blue and lilac dress looks so soft and beautiful against her gorgeous porcelain skin. 

She dips into a curtsey in front of the prince who bows in return. No matter how hard he tries, he can’t stop smiling at his girlfriend, a blush forces its way upon his cheeks. He greets the queen and the king and the 6 of them all head inside. 

“Actually, why don’t you two go take a walk around the grounds?” Stan’s grandmother proposes. 

“Yes, yes of course,” Stan remarks. “Would you do me the honour, princess?”

His girlfriend giggles lightly at the sudden change in demeanour from Stan. Both refused to use royal manners, finding them completely old fashioned and strange. But since in the presence of royalty, the mannerisms apply now. 

The two walk out of the palace and Stan leads them to Mike’s house. Stanley had told her all about Mike’s little cottage hidden by the trees and near a little creek. Patty had been so adamant about being taken to this magical sounding cottage that that is exactly what Stan plans to do.

Down the stone path, they go, past the old rusty metal gate and up to the red front door.

“Ready?” Stan asks Patty.

“Please, it’s been so long,” Patty replies. Stan laughs and barges into the house. “Michael! William! Richard! Edward!”

All 4 men turn around and jump up at the sound of the lady that sounds so familiar. 

“PATTY!!” They all scream and race forward to embrace the young lady.

“Chill guys! Don’t want any of you to kill my soon-to-be-bride,” Stan says. 

Eddie’s the first to pull away, then Richie, Bill and finally Mike. All stare at the royal couple in shock. It hits Eddie quickly, he notices Patty’s dress, it’s of appropriate material and style when meeting another royal family on such a formal occasion. The hypochondriac taps his boyfriend, gesturing to the princess’ outfit, Richie, too, notices.

“To think you were crying over her and your life, less than 24-hours ago. Congrats man!” Richie says clapping his best mate’s back. “Congratulations Patty.”

“Thanks, Rich,” Stan replies.

“Yeah, thank you, Richard,” Patty replies.

Patty has never once called any of the Losers by their nicknames, not even Stan. It’s just a personal preference and the Losers don’t mind. 

The 6 of them sit down in the formal lounge room of the cottage, Patty sitting on Stan’s lap, not wanting to leave him alone for 1 second. He holds her close, resting his head just under her chest. 

For once he doesn’t feel like a 3rd, 5th or 7th wheel now that he has Patty. 

“Mate, do you mind if I steal your thunder for a bit?” Richie asks.

Stan raises an eyebrow knowing full well what Richie has up his sleeve for his boyfriend, “Yes, please! I don’t like the attention,” Stan exclaims.

Stan hates the attention, he’d long for someone, anyone, to take the attention off him. Who’s a better person than Richard ‘Trashmouth’ Tozier to steal the spotlight? 

The Trashmouth drops to one knee and immediately everyone, but Stan, gasps.

“I have thought about this for a while now, we’ve been together for what 8 or 9 years, marry me, Eds?”

Stan tries to stop himself from laughing. Richie’s proposal just made his day 2 times better, Patty, of course, making it 11 times better. 

“Really? Just when Stan got engaged?” Eddie backfires, Richie stands up in defeat. “That’s such a ‘you’ thing to do, but since he gave you permission, yes, yes I will.”

“What, really?” Richie says surprised, “YES!!” He places the ring onto his fiancee’s finger and sits back down beside him. “I call a double wedding!”

The entire room erupts with laughter.

“No Richie, you deserve a wedding that you’d want, away from the bustle of the royal shit that we’ll have to deal with,” Stan says.

“You can have two,” Mike suggests. “We all know that you both hate being royals, so maybe Richie’s proposal isn’t entirely stupid.”

“I’d be down for 2 weddings, it’d give Bev, Kay and I an excuse for some serious girl talk and dress shopping. Hell, Bev could even make both dresses,” Patty exclaims. 

Stan gives her a heartwarming smile, he knows that Bev and Kay are her favourites since she’s got girls to girl-talk with. It warms his heart whenever she speaks or talks to his friends, he gets giddy whenever she jokes around with them. She adds the fuel to Richie’s fire then shuts him down when he gets too chaotic, causing him to shut up immediately. He’s taken her away from the hectic royal life and has allowed her to enjoy the simple life that she once lived. It gives her the means to socialise with others that aren’t stuck up royals.

“Have any of you heard from Bev, Ben and Kay?” Patty asks.

“Kay, no, but Ben and Bev, yes. Why?” Bill asks.

“No reason, I just wanted to see how they’re doing,” Patty replies.

“Kay actually contacted me the other day, she’s doing great,” Richie says and Patty smiles, “and Ben and Bev are currently expecting their first child.”

“No way! That’s amazing!” Patty exclaims. “Good for them.”

“Right, it’s 5:30, we should start to head up,” Stan says.

**** **** **** ****

The walk back up to the palace was quick, they all laughed and chatted as they all ran up the luscious green hill. Patty takes her shoes off and passes them to Stan while she races Richie up the hill, she, inevitably, wins.

“Pitiful, babe! You can have this ring back,” Eddie jokes when they’re at the front door. 

Richie starts to fake cry and begs Eddie to take him back; the two start to laugh at their shenanigans. Once Stan catches up to Patty he gives her back her shoes, and she uses him to lean on as she struggles.

“Here, I got you,” he says and bends down to buckle her shoes.

“Aww, Stanny’s actually sweet,” Mike teases.

“Can it, Hanlon. Maybe you should become the new Trashmouth,” Stan says as he brushes the dirt and grass off his pants. 

Through the main entrance and into the formal living space sits the Kings and Queens, disappointment etched upon their faces. Stan and Patty tense up simultaneously as they look to each of their heads and the 4 commoners stand behind in awkwardness. 

“How long?” The King of Maine asks.

“Three and a half years? Thereabouts,” Stan replies bowing his head in shame and guilt, not wanting to look his fuming grandfather in the eye. 

The 4 boys start to back away, wanting to remove themselves from the drama.

“Stay right where you are!” The King of Maine booms, the 4 men stop right in their tracks not wanting to make the situation any worse. “Did you know?”

“Yes, your majesty,” all 4 say.

“Sit down all 6 of you,” the King of Florida says. All 6 grown adults sit down facing the heads of the two kingdoms. “Did you defile my daughter?” 

Stan gulps, shaking his head vigorously, he can’t form words. The prince shaking with fear, his face growing pale and mouth glued shut, Eddie can sense that his best friend is going to faint at any given moment.

“Your majesty, with all due respect, Stan’s about to faint,” Eddie pipes up.

“Shut your mouth, commoner,” the King of Florida says, Eddie just about has a heart attack, never being yelled at since he left the clutches of his mother. 

“Daddy, you do not have the right to talk to my friends or my boyfriend like that,” the princess pipes up. “Besides, neither of us want to be royals, can’t any of you see that? We’re miserable.”

“He has brainwashed you, sweetheart,” the Queen of Florida says, “we’re leaving! Come along Patricia.” 

Unexpectedly, Patty doesn’t stand up to follow her parents, instead hoists herself onto Stan and grabs hold of Bill and Eddie. The three men show shock and fear on their faces, as Patty’s actions will lead to a huge domino effect of horror. No matter what Patty says or does next will matter, either way, Stan’s friends will be sent away, back to their given states and Patty will be forced to marry someone else. 

“No, you can say things all you want but this is the marriage that you 4 chose for us,” Patty exclaims, “I love him, and I want to go forth with this marriage.” She looks up at the 2 men she’s holding and to the others that are standing too far for her to reach. “They may be commoners but they’re my best friends, they don’t gossip, they aren’t stuck up and nosy. They’re real, truer than anyone in the royal lifestyle will ever be.”

Bill, Eddie, Mike and Richie look down to the stunning girl, sitting on their best friend’s lap. All smiling at her, giving her the support she needs. Her boyfriend’s gleefully smiling up at her, rubbing the small of her back. 

Stan pulls his gaze from Patty to look directly at his grandparents, “there’s a reason dad chose against this life,” Stan says. “I want out.” 

He looks back up to Patty, smiling, before turning back to his grandparents “I know that you won’t pull away from your arrangement simply because you need an heir. Call this manipulation all you want, but you have manipulated me for, what, 8 years?” He turns to the boys behind him, “Guys, 8 years, right?”

“Yes,” Richie says. 

“If he’s out, I’m out,” Patty says, “I’ve always wanted to become a fashion designer.” 

“Talk it over, we’re going to my room to ... hang,” Stan announces and drags his friends and girlfriend up the stairs to his quarters. 

**** **** **** ****

An hour later, the 6 of them are called back down to the dining hall and there they are met with 4 stern-looking faces. If there is any moment to curl into a ball under the bed, in fear, now would be a great time. Having 4 royal heads staring at you out of anger really doesn’t sit well with anyone’s anxiety levels.

Nobody says anything and all take their respective seats. Stan and Patty sit across from each other only sharing sorrowful glances, no one cracks a smile or says anything. Eddie kicks Richie under the table a few times to get him to try and not talk. 

It’s quiet, too quiet. It’s eery, nobody speaks, the clatter of cutlery on the ceramic plates are the only sound that everyone hears; the servants can only stand and watch awkwardly at the silent dinner. 

“Is this how you truly feel, Stanley?” His grandfather asks.

“I’m sorry sir, I don’t quite understand,” Stan replies.

“Do you not want to be a royal?” The King rephrases.

“No, I always thought I’d be an accountant of sorts,” Stan admits truthfully. “Why?”

“As much as we need an heir; if you’re not happy …” Stan stops eating and looks directly at his grandfather.

“You’d have no one else. So as long as I get something in return, I will be your heir.” If he puts his life on the line

“As you wish.” He looks at the other 3 heads before turning back to Stan, “we will discuss it tonight and we will have a decision for you in the morning.”

Silence follows quickly, no one says another thing. Servants give each other silent head movements to start clearing the table or to place the platter down. 

“Grandfather, you didn’t hear what - “ Stan’s cut off.

“Stanley, your girlfriend made it perfectly clear,” the King of Maine says.

Stan looks up to Patty who smiles smugly. It’s the first time that Stan and Patty had ever heard anyone, that wasn’t the Losers or any of Patty’s high school friends, call them ‘boyfriend & girlfriend’. 

Patty had her own ‘Losers Club’, just a group of 4 girls and 1 boy, they aren’t as close as the Losers Club and that’s simply because of 1 of the girls and the guy dated before they split. It had caused a rift in the group and it left them with Patty, Lucy (the other only girl that stayed) and the guy. Stan hasn’t met him yet but he has met Lucy on a number of occasions. 

*

After dinner the Losers and Patty head back down to the cottage, champagne is being poured, the really expensive one that Stan had given Bill after he sold his first book. As the bubbly is passed around multiple times, the more that they all forgot about the more pressing matter that is being talked over in the palace.

Patty and Eddie, not being used to handle such high amounts of alcohol, stumbled too and fro. Stan finds it cute, as his girlfriend, sorry, fiance, sways and hiccups but is still heavily concerned that she’ll hurt herself.

“Guys, we’re just going to head to bed, I know she’ll regret this in the morning,” Stan announces and leads his fiance down the hall to one of the 3 guest bedrooms.

As usual, he places her in the recovery position and a bowl beside her, in case she needs to throw up. He gets himself into some comfortable clothes and slides in beside her, holding her tight. 

  
  


**** **** **** ****

A few months of planning later and the royal wedding is about to take place. Although, Stan and Patty had managed to pull a few strings to make it a smaller gathering rather than the extravagant one that the royals tend to have. Even though their grandparents/parents didn’t approve of such a small wedding, they still planned one anyway. 

As Stan arrives at the synagogue, with Richie, Mike, Bill, Eddie and Ben in tow, they are all taken aback by the decorations that Bev, Kay and Patty had picked out. If there was one thing that Patty couldn’t get, it was her meadow wedding that she had always longed for. With Stan’s grandparents being highly religious, they demanded that the wedding was in a synagogue, much to Stan’s dismay. 

Stanley only wants Patty to be happy, and he had almost thrown hands at his grandfather when he broke the news to Patty. As she started to tear up, Stan went immediately into protective mode and had to be held down by Bev and Kay, who were there to help Patty explain the wedding plans to everyone.

“It’s beautiful,” Eddie says in awe, “the girls sure did a great job.”

“Yeah, they did,” Stan remarks.

With only close friends and family attending, Stan and Patty had found a fairly small synagogue. The only issue, to Stan’s grandparents, at least, is that it’s in Derry. No matter how much Stan hated Derry, he’s thrilled that he’s been able to finally show Patty his childhood, where he played, lived, was educated etc. Not to mention, Patty finally met his parents and they couldn’t be more thrilled.

They move past the decorations and focus on a small number of guests already sitting in the pews, most of which were part of Patty's family and friends. He couldn't be any more nervous than he is in this present moment, within the next 30 minutes the love of his life is going to walk down the aisle and say 'I Do' in front of their family, friends and the entire world, because they couldn't get out of their ceremony being televised to the entire world. 

The moment couldn't come any faster

*

As the moment encroaches, the final few guests start to file in and Stan starts to get jittery. 

"You okay?" Richie asks Stan, who can only nod in response, too afraid that if he spoke he'll throw up.

At any moment, the music will start and the bridesmaids will flow down the aisle. As much as he wants to run away in fear, he knows that this is what he wants, he wants to be with her forever, whether a royal or not. 

Stan watches as the string quartet raise their instruments, symbolising the incoming bridal party. He takes a deep breath in just as beads of sweat start to form on his forehead, his palms start to sweat and his stomach starts to tie in a knot. His eyes dart to Bev who walks down the aisle first, the only thing he focuses on is her gorgeous, long auburn hair, the is curled and braided into a high ponytail as it bounces with each step. She sends a friendly reassuring smile towards the nervous groom, to which he sends a nervous smile back. 

Kay McCall comes down next, her long brown hair done exactly like Bev's, his eyes dart to the dress and notices that even though it's the same colour and material, her's is tied around her neck while Bev's straps were tied on the shoulder. Either way, he thinks that both women look beautiful and that can only mean that his bride that is about to enter will look breath-takingly gorgeous that will bring a tear to his eyes. 

And just as Kay makes her final steps towards the last pew, everyone stands as Patty stands in the doorway, with her dad beside her. Stan makes direct eye contact with her and immediately tears up. In Beverly fashion, she tore right away from tradition. Patty stands in a pastel purple (lilac if you will), off-shoulder gown, with a lace bodice, the lace doubles as the sleeves and a light, flowy, sheer material for the skirt, that appears to have multiple layers with lining underneath. Patty has never been one for tradition and it's obvious that she used Bev's and Kay's eccentric minds to her advantage. 

Stan can only smile as he tries his hardest not to tear up at the sight, he didn't want to ruin the gorgeous image by the blurriness of the tears. 

His bride looks absolutely stunning, and as she nears the alter, he's beaming; cheeks burning from smiling so hard.

"You look beautiful," he whispers to her, voice cracking a little.

Patty can only blush in response, too nervous to find the words, but manages to muster out and, "I love you", before turning her attention to the Rabbi. 

*

The service flies by, all so surreal to the prince; he can't believe it, he's married to the love of his life and is destined to become King ... even if he isn't happy about it, at least he has the right person by his side. As the newlywed couple leave the synagogue, hand in hand, Stan catches a glimpse of his grandpa's disapproving eye. They hadn't told the respective Kings and Queens of their choice of ceremony, only that it would be small and in Derry. The heir to Maine's throne, smirks and locks eyes with the King of Maine, it only makes the King angrier, and with one final step past the last pew, Stan grins widely, showing his true contentment in knowing that he pissed off his grandfather. 

The ceremony had no filming but their first kiss on the steps of the synagogue would, so the couple made their descent down the first few steps and give the film crew, with their cameras, the kiss that the royal followers have been longing for few the past few weeks. Stan and Patty are then greeted by their families, all smiling (most faked), they all wave towards the camera before Stan helps Patty down the remaining steps to the horse and cart in front of the temple. 

"That was a beautiful ceremony," Patty whispers to her betrothed as they both wave the cameras adios.

"That it was dear, couldn't have been any better," Stan whispers back.

As the cart finally goes out of sight from the cameras and their family and friends, the two face each other, smiling brightly. Nothing in this present moment could change their mood, they are as content as they could possibly be. Their love for each other can only grow stronger now that they are bound by the rings on their fingers.

"Shame we couldn't do a double wedding with Richie and Eddie," Patty says.

"I don't, Richie has taken full control, reception is going to be a cocktail party in a nightclub's reception room," Stan replies. "But enough about them, today is all about us."

The smile on his face is contagious, forcing Patty to return the bright grin that is etched upon her husband's face.

**** **** **** ****

After the dinner at the reception and as the rounds of champagne, wine, beer and gin & tonics keep on coming, the moment of speeches have arrived. Richie is passed the microphone from Patty's maid of honour and Stan can only sweat in anticipation. 

The tipsy (maybe borderline drunk) Richie stands up, the speech in his hand, "Normally I'm the one that starts the night off, but as tradition goes, Maid of Honour first then me, the best man."

A few chuckles erupt from the crowd.

Richie smiles weakly and continues on, "Stanley Urine, Stan the Man, I never thought this day would come." Richie staggers away from the wedding party's table and to the centre of the room. "You see folks, this young man never wanted to get married, never thought of himself as the married type. Mind you, we were only what 6? 7? Stan?"

Chuckles echo in the large reception hall, Stan hangs his head, out of fear of what will come next. 

"Then when we were 14, I found him in our clubhouse rehearsing how he planned to ask out the "hottest" girl in school," Richie says, using air quotes around _hottest_. "I use air marks because she really wasn't, the hottest girl in school was Sandy Buttler. But he always had a thing for Harriet Shrew, the girl that was as smart as me, a straight-A student, wore giant coke bottle glasses. If anything she was the female version of me, just without the inappropriate humour."

"Stan the Man is an expert bird watcher and loves the creatures to bits. He took me out once, I was under the impression that he meant women, coz, you know, that was the language we used back then, women were often called 'birds'," Richie earnt some laughs from those that know him and his humour, but earnt glares from most of Patty's side. "But it was that moment that brought him and I closer. We talked about things that I didn't feel comfortable telling my boyfriend or Bev, my wing woman and sister-from-another-mister. He was the first person I came out to."

The comedian takes a pause and locks eyes with his best friend.

"When Stan found out that he was a prince, he came to me first. The boy was in tears, he didn't want it, he dreamt about going to college and becoming an accountant or something like that. But a few years after his training, he met Patty. And can I just say, I have never seen him so happy, he was always a downer in high school, so this took a turn for the better. Even though their relationship was basically forbidden, they found a way and I find that absolutely romantic.

"Patty, you made him a better, happier person. We are proud to call you an honourable member of our Losers Club. Welcome to the family Patty Blum Uris - sorry Princess Patricia of Florida."

Richie raises his glass of whiskey to the ceiling and everyone follows.

"To the bride and groom," the comedian toasts.

"To the bride and groom," the rest of the room choruses, with that, the couple kisses again and take a sip from their champagne flute.

The speech was impeccable, Stan was sure that he'd be asking security to escort the trashmouth out of the building, instead, it was chaotic and sweet (in a trashmouth sense). The young prince is in absolute awe and feels as though he's on cloud-9; he's in a state of euphoria and nothing could brink his spirits down. 


End file.
